First, a very happy 19th birthday to Aunt Shorty!!!
So I seem to be really slacking on updating this blog, but this summer is just crazy busy so forgive me!
So I had my bachelorette on the 18th and it was fun and all of us had a great time. The only crappy part was, the Friday night that I got there I started with a sore throat! By Saturday night I had a pretty bad cold and my throat hurt just to breathe. I didn’t get ANY sleep and needless to say the drive home on Sunday was long and I just wanted to cry I felt so sick. When I got home I ended up in bed and tried to sleep. A had a good weekend with daddy and grandma and was a good boy.
Monday the 21st I had my four wisdom teeth pulled under a general anesthetic….figured I might as well feel like crap for everything all at once! If I didn’t get them out that day then I was looking at waiting until September and there was NO WAY that I could wait that long. They have been so painful and keeping me up at night. Recovery went very well and I only ended up taking pain meds on the Wednesday. Much easier than I thought that it was going to be!
Tuesday evening (the 22nd) I noticed that A seemed to sound congested. While we were out I picked up some benadryl to give him to hopefully help him sleep. By Wednesday he was VERY sick. He is now on a monitor at night again as I need to know what he is doing. Overall he has been doing pretty good but there are definitely moments where he drops very low and does need some suctioning and stimulation. I just hope that I am able to keep caring for him here and not have him end up in hospital. This is now day 8 for him and he doesn’t seem to be getting any better. I however still have a bit of congestion and cough so I am not too worried at this point.
So since my last update not too much has been going on as we have been kinda trying to recover and get better. It totally sucks being sick! I tried SO hard to do everything right but of course he still ended up getting it from me.
On another note, today was the day that A got his wheelchair. We are trialing it for a month and see how it goes. If I am happy with this one then they will order the same and if not then we will trial another one. I was excited to get there and see this wheelchair and have something for him to finally sit properly in and get rid of this darn stroller that I can’t stand! At the same time it is hard because although we have always known that he would end up in a chair it is reality. I have to tell you though, he sits AMAZING in this chair!!!! We will definitely have to use it a ton more to see how it works and we base our decision on the chair very well.
When we got out to the car and loaded up the wheelchair and his stroller I was okay. It was when I looked in my mirror and saw the wheelchair in the back that I started to cry. There definitely is a process that I will have to go through to deal with this. J and I have both been talking about this wheelchair for a bit and I know that we both hoped that maybe, just maybe he wouldn’t need one. High hopes, but as parents it is one of the hardest things to accept. That your child will never walk.
Anyways, A and I went to the mall afterwards so I could try it out and get a few things done at the same time. So far, no complaints! The only complaint I do have is how many people STARE! It drives me up the friggin wall. Now most of the people that stare are children and really they don’t any better, but it is their parents job to teach them about how kids can be different. When kids aren’t told about things like this then they just don’t know what to think. Well anyways, that is a whole other post.
Daddy came home from work pretty early today and when I heard him come in I went into the kitchen. He looked at the chair and said “wow, his other one didn’t look anything like that.” I said “what, like a wheelchair?” Then his tears came. We hugged and cried together.
Well first I want to start this post off by saying that A has been wonderful since Saturday evening!!!!! He went for a nap on Saturday and when he woke up it was like he was back to himself!!! I didn’t even realize until about 10pm that he was not whining, not crying, not fussing! I can’t really say WHY things happened like this but I am sure not complaining.
I think it may have to do with me lowering his calories and doing the 10-8am feed and slow feeds in the day. He was always on 30cal/oz and I put him up to 37cal/oz when we came home. However I did talk to a few other moms that said their kids took a while to get up that high so I went down to 33cal/oz. The only thing that stinks is that he is on feeds throughout the entire night but I guess we have to do what works for him best!
Since Saturday night he has also not required oxygen at all and sits above 93. Of course he still has his ton of desats but at least he isn’t requiring the oxygen to stay above 90. I can’t explain this either but it is great. I had put him to bed Saturday night with the nasal prongs on, hooked him up to the monitor (no oxygen on yet) and he was at 97. I decided to leave him off the oxygen for a bit and for almost an hour he didn’t drop below 88 so I left him off it. And it has been that way since.
I do think there are going to be times that he requires oxygen but I am just so happy that it isn’t something that he needs every single night.
Physio and OT came on Monday and he did great. I really wasn’t thinking that it would work out anymore because of how he has been but it was nice to see him doing things that I haven’t seen him do in a while. He has been put on the waiting list for the seating clinic so that we can work with them to get him into a wheelchair probably within the next year.
It is so nice to see my little man back to the way I remember him. It has been a while. He isn’t without the gagging, odd vomit or blue spell but he is HAPPY and that is what matters to me the most!!!
Now for some long overdue pics of my little man!!
Well we are still a pretty sick household here! A is on day 11 and mommy is on day 6. I never understand how we get sick because I am constantly washing my hands and using sanitizer. But it just goes to show that you can’t kill every germ that comes your way!
I had to post these next two pictures because they are just way too cute! Now anyone that knows us, knows that the dogs are NOT allowed on the furniture. They are very good about not getting up but lately Cujo has been doing some sneaking. I have come home a couple of times to find hair on A’s blanket. Well the other day I came in and he was sound asleep so I had to grab the camera…
Yesterday A had his two year check up with growth and development. The doctor that he sees is absolutely awesome and I always am happy to go and happy when I leave. He was very happy with A and the progress that he has had since he last saw him six months ago. Of course, six months ago he didn’t have his cochlear implant and that has brought him so much further.
The first thing that he always says is “so….brag about A.” I have gotten good but I admit the first time that I met him and he asked me I started crying.
I admire this doctor because he is honest and to the point. I was asking him his thoughts on ABR therapy and hyperbarics and he said “if it sounds too good to be true, than it probably is.” I am always looking for ways to improve A’s life and have done tons and tons of research into many different things that I would like to maybe try. However it is hard when some of these things are huge amounts of money and there is no guarantee that it will benefit him.
The power wheelchair was brought up again and it looks like he really will be going into one next year. I will be calling kidsability to get A into the seating clinic for this as well as trying to find him a suitable seating device for in the home. I am having a heck of a time with him now that he is older and wants to go, go, go. The only place here that he sits properly is his swing, however he is getting to the point where he is almost too big for it. With hip and spine issues with kids that have CP I have to worry about his posture constantly.
I told him that I really worry about the future and what A will be like. I always wonder if he is going to be the kid with CP but totally there and right on target with his friends or if he is going to be the kid with CP that is 15 but at a much lower age level. I know that he can’t tell me but I admit that is one of the things that I think about all of the time. That is the one thing that really sucks about cerebral palsy. The waiting game….
All in all it was a great appointment. I had a call the other day from his secretary to remind me about the appointment and to add more time because we would have to do the Bailey’s test. I was not impressed. I think that these tests to see where your child is developmentally are just crazy to do for a child that has cerebral palsy and is deaf. At the end of the appointment with him he said he would see us next year. I asked about the Bailey test and he said “nope, you are not doing it.” Right on!
We headed up to the NICU to see if one of A’s nurses was on, but of course no luck again. We haven’t seen her in a year! If you are reading this Marg, we try and see you all the time and miss you! We did get to see Joyce although A was upset with her for leaving him. hahaha
We really miss having Joyce around. She is absolutely amazing and one of the most caring, loving nurses that I know.
And now for my little man. As you can see the sickness doesn’t stop this kid from smiling!
Well today was our trip to Mac to meet with A’s growth and development doctor, Rosenbaum. The last time that we saw him was in October. It wasn’t as in depth as the last two seemed but that is obviously because they know his history now and are just following him as he gets older and progresses.
A was being his normal happy self. Smiling and cooing like crazy at this doctor. He was very happy with how social A is and how he interacts in general. When I mentioned his eyes (because he didn’t have glasses the last time) he was kind of shocked at him being a -7 in each eye. He said that he is a -9 and he is basically blind without his glasses. I think it is always hard for me to imagine what it is like for A because I don’t wear glasses and can see fine. I do know that within the past two weeks or so when A sees me taking his glasses out of the case in the morning he smiles. Definitely a sort of sign from him that he likes to have them on.
When he asked me to brag about what A does that is always hard for me. I have to stop myself from getting emotional. I love A to death but it is always hard for me to think of how he has changed. With me being around him all of the time it is harder for me to notice the different things that he is doing. When I look back over the past year it is like not much has changed. But yet when you look at it in a big picture there are things. Just not as noticeable as a child that progresses at the “normal” rate.
I told him about A rolling from his tummy to his back, which he was happy to hear. But at the same time that is the easiest way for a baby to roll. I however am ecstatic that he is doing this!
The most difficult and exciting topic was brought up today. He said to me “have you thought much about A getting an electric wheelchair?” WOW I have to admit that I was a little thrown off. (Another moment of holding back the tears for sure) I think what was so much more difficult was because this was the doctor who “refused” to say that A had cerebral palsy. Wanted to just keep an eye on him and see how he progresses.
So in my head I am thinking how A is not even two yet and that would be years and years down the road. Nope…he said he would like to see A getting into one at the age of three, maybe four. For real?! Yes he was for real. I have to admit that I have NEVER even really thought about the whole wheelchair issue. I have known deep down that A would most likely not walk, but thinking of wheelchairs is hard for me.
As for an electric wheelchair, well that would have been the LAST type I would have thought with A. He said they have done studies with kids and it shows how much more they open up with being able to manipulate what they are doing on their own. How much it opens up their worlds. He said it is something that even *I* would notice with A. His behaviour and attitude. But three, four years old? I didn’t know that was possible. He believes that A is brighter than we think he is and that he would be one of the “ones” that could use an electric wheelchair. Can you imagine my little man in a motorized wheelchair at the age of three/four?! His world will be so much bigger than it is now!
So I left this meeting with Dr.Rosenbaum with my dad and A feeling happy and sad. Happy because A is the most amazing kid in the world and sad because once again reality hit me in the head. Don’t get me wrong, I am not sad that A WILL need a wheelchair, it is just always hard to hear docs tell you things that you already know. Makes it “real”.
Anyhow I will end this post with a few pics of my little man last night. I had gone for coffee with my brother because J wanted to finish watching the Leaf game. I told him to put A to bed and I wouldn’t be long. I told my brother that I could bet him any amount of money…A would NOT be in bed. I was right! He was sleeping on the floor on his pillow. Too cute!