Books, Books and More Books!

I am so amazed at how much A is hearing with his implant. He has always been a big TV fan but I see now how much more he pays attention to it. Especially when there is music playing. This is something I had always dreamed for him! When I found out that he had cerebral palsy my hopes were that music could guide him in life. However we then found out he was deaf and my dreams were crushed. I wondered how on earth he would find his place in the world. Well now with technology and his wonderful cochlear implant my dream is starting to happen! Just look at the concentration this kid has!

Thursday A went and spent the day with grandma at her place. With the heat as crazy as it was I just knew he wouldn’t be happy here. Daddy and I headed to Orangeville for the afternoon so that he could do his final drive test.

Friday I met with a mortgage specialist to see what J and I are able to do. He was very nice and helped me think a lot about what we are able to do and not what we WANT to do. I have to admit that I always find it a bit odd when people ask “what is wrong with him?” (Meaning A of course.) I told him the basic “he was born premature and has cerebral palsy.” Of course not everyone knows what cerebral palsy is and I have to remember this. He then wanted to know why he was wearing glasses and what was on his head, meaning the implant. So I told him. He said to me “oh that is so sad.” Of course many think this but they do not know A. It isn’t sad. A isn’t sad. It is just a different way of life. It angers me when people pity me and feel sorry for A. This is one reason why children LIKE A have such a hard time in this world. People don’t realize that they are just like everyone else except that things have to be done differently.

He then went on to ask about the future. Like, “what about in 20 years from now? Most people have kids and then they grow up and move out….” Well I said “I try not to think of the future but rather live for the day.” Hmmm no response. Now everyone that knows me, knows that I worry A LOT about the future however I have never really thought as far as 20 years!!

The last comment that blew me away was “well you could just have another one.” I took this as having another one would kind of “replace” A. I could never replace A. He has been through so much and has come so far and amazes everyone around him. Of course I would love to have another child but I want to wait until I know that A is more “stable” if that is the right word.

It angers me that he said all these things to me (and you special needs mommies know EXACTLY what I am talking about) but at the same time I have to realize that my life isn’t the normal life. There are so many people in this world that don’t even realize that things like this go on. I mean this guy had to be about 50 and yet he didn’t understand prematurity, cerebral palsy and all the needs that come with it. And if he has never been around it how can I expect him to understand? I can’t. All I can do is try to educate as I go about my days.

Anyhow, yesterday was a great day. A and I went out and did some running around that needed to be done. Then I decided to take him to Chapters to buy him a new book. This kid absolutely LOVES books now and it is so awesome to be able to read to him now and know that he is hearing everything I am saying! I always have read to him but the feeling now is just overwhelming.

I ended up buying him a few books and we have already read them over and over and over. I think I can read most of them now with my eyes closed!

We did some more time in the Pony. Of course with us having carpet it makes it difficult but it is still good for him to stand and put weight onto his legs and hips.

On another exciting note, A is LOVING when you stand him up holding him. He now even moves his legs to walk towards you!!!! He gets SOOOO excited! I have it on video but I don’t know how to put them on here yet. I cannot believe that he KNOWS to move his legs/feet to walk. My little smartie pants!

2 responses

  1. Lisa

    The average person has no idea what a mom of a preemie has been through which comes through in their insensitive questions and comments.Maybe those people are better off just saying nothing.The world cannot be fixed by ‘just making another one’…

    August 7, 2007 at 4:28 pm

  2. Billie

    I am so glad to hear that the CI is going well, and that you are noticing the little things he is responding to now. Just wait! It continues to get better! Eden asks for certain books by name now, and will sometimes fill in a missing word if we pause. Very cool.You’re right… People do say the darndest things. It’s great that you try to remain positive and understanding of their perspective. I definitely don’t think Ashton is “sad.” I think he’s super-cool and I can’t wait for the chance to meet him.A lady at the toy store said something similar when I mentioned that Eden has CP. She said “Oh, I’m so sorry.” I know her heart was in the right place, but it always strikes me as a strange thing to hear. I guess it’s just hard for me when I think people are looking at her or me feeling sorry for us. They just don’t know how great our kiddos are just the way they are!

    August 8, 2007 at 2:38 am

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